Taking a break from dating men
The very notion of "taking a break" from the one you love is often times misinterpreted as a somewhat cowardly way of ending the relationship without stating so bluntly for public consumption.
In fact, what some refer to as one's "need for space from the partner" does appear to be a legitimate cry for just that -- .
When you hear the phrase, “We were on a break,” you may immediately think of Ross and Rachel on “Friends” whose relationship seemed to unravel after they decided to take a break from one another.
But part of the reason for their break’s lack of success had to do with the fact that each one had a different idea of what taking a break actually meant.
Here are 22 ways to know if it may be time for you to take a much-needed break from dating and redirect your energy elsewhere for a while. When you are out shopping and the cashier tells you to swipe your credit card, you ask, "Left or right? You have 104 matches on Tinder but are sitting home on a Saturday night because there is no one in the world worth dating. There are six guys in your phone's contacts bearing the same name and you say a small prayer each time you send a text that you have sent it to the right one. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle is your dating philosophy, not an anti-pollution slogan. When you are matched with someone new, you become excited because the guy's got a different name from those of the legions you have already dated. You automatically disqualify a guy based on whether or not you like his name or because of its negative connotation for you. You resort to posting a picture of yourself online with an exotic animal like all of those other "idiots" you used to laugh about. You realize guys actually find said picture of you interesting and now believe you have wasted valuable resources all of this time. When you look through your phone's contacts, you do not remember who some of the guys are but are certain you dated them. You keep repeating to your date, "Did I tell you this story already? You are tempted to refer a new date to your blog's URL so you need not waste time repeating your life story yet again. You fear meeting exes on the street while on a date in New York City. Every time a relationship ends you push a mental reset button on your wardrobe and wistfully wonder if you will ever be lucky enough to repeat an outfit with the same guy. You are worried the train conductor on NJ Transit has seen you wearing the same dress twice in a week because (a) you have and (b) you and the conductor are now on a first-name basis. Before dates you catch yourself singing, "The time was six o'clock on the Swatch watch, no time to chill, got a date, can't be late." (Bell Biv De Voe, "Do Me") 16.
You develop mnemonic devices to help remember where the guy you are dating lives.
Taking time off allows you the space you need to reevaluate what’s best for you, your partner and your relationship and gives you the alone time you need to figure out exactly what you want.
But would canceling really have been such a bad idea? You spend an inordinate amount of time getting dressed. Friends excitedly ask when you started commuting to the city for work and you sheepishly explain that dating is now your full-time job. You really just want to chow down on a cheeseburger and fries at the Shake Shack instead of a salad and grilled fish at yet another expensive restaurant. You become a badass to your dates and suddenly realize the less you care the more they do. You are happy you just got dumped because now you finally have an excuse to stay home.In fact, taking a break enables both you and your partner to use the time away from one another as an opportunity to reflect on your relationship, reassess your feelings for one another and either resolve to be with each other going forward or not.Many couples decide to take a break because they’re facing some relationship challenges, difficulties and/or doubts, but they don’t want to break up or give up on the relationship or on each other.For instance, perhaps you and your partner care about each other deeply, but you just can’t seem to stop fighting and arguing over every single thing.Or perhaps you’re slightly unsure about your true feelings for your partner in terms of a real future together, but you’re still hopeful that there could be something long-lasting between the two of you.
Trial separation is not synonymous with lack of love and/or lack of desire to be with your significant other down the line.